Personal finance is something of an obsession in our culture, isn’t it?  We’re pretty well aware of how well we’re doing (or not) and intensely curious about how others are doing—often so we can compare ourselves with them.   But as much as we want to know about the financial conditions of others, how open are we about revealing the financial details of our own lives, particularly to those closest to us—family and friends. 

Often, it comes down to individual financial categories—we’re more open about discussing some areas of our finances, and less so with others.  How open are you about the major components of your financial lives with those closest to you, and why might you feel the way you do?

Income

There’s almost a sense that income is the broadest definition of our worth to society, so this figure tends to take on exaggerated importance.  The government tracks income numbers closely, and anyone you apply to for a loan with will want to know.  But how much do we want others close to us to know?  It’s all relative…and some of it is even driven by ego!

Why you would be secretive.  You make less than most of the people in your family and social circle.  You make less than people in comparable positions.  Or you make more than those closest to you, and don’t want them to resent you in any way.

Why you wouldn’t.  You make more than those closest to you, and you DO want them to know—it feels good!  Or you hold a position where the income range is publicly known, so there’s no point in trying to hide it.

Savings and investments

Since this represents money taken out of income and it isn’t spent on anything tangible, it is by far the easiest part of our financial lives to keep secret from others. 

Why you would be secretive.  If you don’t have any—you might not want others to know this, especially those closest to you.  On the flip side, you might not want others to know that you have a lot for fear that they might approach you for financial help.  Or they may resent that you’re “rich” and they aren’t.

Why you wouldn’t.  Like Hollywood celebrities and Wall Street tycoons you want others to know what you’ve got.

Debt

Debt is probably the “inner sanctum” of personal finance—the topic most of us are most hesitant to reveal to others.  It isn’t just a matter of not wanting others to know our obligations either.  Debt is probably the single greatest barometer of financial mismanagement, which is something we don’t feel particularly comfortable revealing to family and friends.

Why you would be secretive.  The most obvious is that you have too much of it.  Another is that there are members in your family and social circle who are judgmental about even the smallest amount of debt.  Still another is that you have no debt, and don’t want to emphasize that fact to people you care about who may be in over their heads.

Why you wouldn’t.  You’re debt free and justifiably proud of it!  Or you’re in trouble and looking for help.

Spending habits

This is probably the hardest financial category to be secretive about—under the assumption that you even cared to be.  People can see how we spend money in the things that we buy and through the lifestyle that we lead.  They usually even know how much we’re spending either from personal experience or because the price of most anything you can buy these days are on TV or the worldwide web.

Why you would be secretive.  Though it would be hard to hide, you might want to keep this quiet if you have debt problems, knowing that some people might judge you for buying when you really shouldn’t.  Conversely, if you didn’t want people to know how well off you are, you might try to keep your spending on the down low.  This can be especially true when you’re trying to be sensitive with family and close friends who might be going through hard times.

Why you wouldn’t.  The most obvious—you want to show off!  This isn’t tongue-in-cheek; some people want others to know that they’re doing well and will demonstrate with spending habits.  Alternate explanation: you don’t really care what others think of your finances or spending habits.

How much of your personal finances do you reveal to family and friends?