Being a college student is different than anything you’ve ever experienced in your life so far.  You are probably living away from home.  You’re taking classes from professors who don’t know you, you are thinking about a career, and you are one small fish in an enormous population of students.

MentorNow, more than ever, you may need a mentor.   Mentors are more than parental substitutes:  They provide guidance about your studies and prospective career, and they serve as reliable and trusted advisors as you navigate the path to independence.

Mentors come in many shapes and forms.  Over the next few years, you may find that your needs and interests change.  Where initially you did just fine with an senior classmate, later on you may find that a community member is more helpful.

So how to you find them, and  how and what do you ask? 

Start with a purpose

 Before you begin the search for a mentor, decide what you want from him or her.  Mentors can:

  • Help you with campus issues related to your major or minor.   What classes matter most? Which professors should you study under?  How do you find internships?  What about grad school?
  • Give you career guidance.  At some point during college, you may need a advice from someone in your chosen field.  Experienced  professionals will help you network and answer questions.  Recent grads in entry-level positions in your field can give you tips and hints about your job search.
  • Serve as life coaches.  The world is full of wonderful people willing to take college kids under their wings.  Sometimes we need people who will have us over for dinner, take us to coffee and talk about life, nurture our souls.

Where to look

Mentors can be found almost anywhere.  

  • Mentors to help you with campus issues can be:   Teaching or research assistants in your department, friendly professors,  members of academic sororities or fraternities, and upper classmen.  Adjunct professors, who have established careers in a field and teach one or two classes on the side, have a balanced view of college and career.
  • You can find mentors in your chosen career by contacting managers and presidents of companies, consultants, or business organizations.  Find a firm you’re interested in, and call to ask if someone would meet with you.
  • Life coaches and advisors can be found in your church or synagogue, community organizations, fraternal organizations, clubs, and senior centers.  All you have to do is ask.  

How to ask

Before you approach a prospective mentor, be clear about what you want.   You aren’t asking for a job, or even help finding one.  You are asking for an advisor, someone you can touch base with and learn from.   Be direct and positive.

Think about how often you want to meet:  Twice a month for coffee?  After services on Saturdays?  Tuesday evening at the club?   Be direct, humble, and grateful.   If you are struggling with something, state the problem objectively and avoid complaining.   Nobody wants to become a mentor to a whiner!   

Above all, ask questions and listen to the answers you receive.   Mentors want to work with people who are interested in them and what they have to offer, not needy people who just want an outlet for complaints.

Do not hesitate to seek out mentors in a variety of settings.   This is the earliest form of networking for you, and you cannot help but benefit from differing perspectives.

Photo: chifa217, Creative Commons Attribution 2.0